Hi There! I'm Samantha!
I'm a galactic bounty hunter for hire! (Please hire me; I need better food.) This is my website. I you enjoy the things it has. :-)
To explore this site, start off with the navigation bar up top! We've got an About section, which has a brief bio and some mailbags. There's a Works section with some of my art and games. Then there's my favorite section, the Maps section, which has maps of over 25 games and counting! Beyond that are all the usual accoutrements of a website, such as Articles, Links, and a Forum.
Sometimes I do other things off this website, such as star in some silly ZZT games or even stream as a low-budget virtual-tuber. There's such a huge universe out there, and I'm always glad I can be a part of it in whatever way I can!
Anyhow, with all of that said, I hope you enjoy all the beautiful sights this site has to offer! I worked very hard on it, and I hope it brightens up your day. :)
Updates
Stay tuned for the latest and greatest website updates in the galaxy!
2025 January 26
It's been a hot minute since I made a map of a Metroid 1 hack (last March with the Confrontation NES port, I think), so it's about time that I made another one!
The hack in question is simply titled "Metroid Adventure." It's a hack that appears to have been made as a self-imposed challenge by the author --- essentially, he decided to create a brand new (ish) world layout, but only using screens from the original game. Unfortunately, MetEdit back in the day did not support moving items around on the map, severely limiting the choices the author could make. Moreover, the choices that the author did choose to make were actively antagonistic. In the hack's readme, the author brags about all of the "long passages," "backtracking," and "confusing map design." For a fun exercise, see if you can figure out the intended path to get bombs from the start. :) (Bonus points if you can figure out a shortcut.)
Anyhow, the map is slightly plainer than my other Metroid 1 maps, and I did that to make it more readable given how convoluted the world layout is. Sorry to everybody who likes how I usually retain the colors of the structures. :(
The author's next hack, Project Ridien, was considerably more ambitious, but we'll get to the particulars of that one's design later. ;)
As always, the map is on the map page.
2025 January 15
Last month I got the chance to appear on a podcast. It was fun, but I was quite nervous and felt kinda out of it during the recording. Anyhow, I guess a couple days ago the episode finally got edited and published finally. I gave it a listen myself, and I think the editor did a little magic or something, because somehow I didn't sound like a complete blithering idiot the whole time (small miracles).
Anyhow, you can listen to the episode here. The podcast is called "Topic Lords", which claims to be the only place on the internet you can go to hear topics be discussed. The showrunner is some guy named "Jim," and each week he rounds up a couple friends to commit some ADHD ramblings to audio files. (I still don't understand how I ended up on his list of friends.) In addition to me, some other fella named "esper" was there cohosting with me. We got to talk about ZZT, Dracula, memes, and a bunch of other stuff.
Give it a listen!
2025 January 6
Another year, another map, as they all say.
This new map (on ye map page) is of a hack called "METROID: Galactic Marine." It's a novel sort of half-total conversion that makes you play as a much wimpier protagonist than Samus, like Master Chief. Compared to Samus, your pitiful marine can't jump as high, has a weaker gun, can't spin jump, can't roll into a ball, and can't even collect energy drops. Survival is a carefully earned commodity, and not in the least bit guaranteed. Your endgame power level is maaaybe within reach of Samus in the midgame. While I personally wouldn't call it survival horror by any means, it's still an interesting case study in vulnerability and disempowerment.
Anyhow, if you want to play this hack you can get it here.
...oh wait the hack's update is still in the dreaded approval queue. Uhhhhh, check out it's forum thread instead.
2025 January 1
Happy New Year!
I don't have much to add here, other than I changed the "Future Maps" sidebar on the maps page to include the name of whatever map(s) I happen to be working on.
I will likely edit that little bit on whim, without posting anything about it on the frontpage here. Please understand.
2024 December 24
It's almost Christmas, which means that it's the perfect time for some Christmasy art!
Over in the visual arts section of the site, we have two Christmas cards by moi! One is from last year, and shows me skiing. The other is from today, and depicts the Nativity.
Over in the received art section, we have a lovely, lovely gift piece by a certified friend of the show, kkzero. I won't spoil what it is, but I will say it's cute. :3
Happy holy days to y'all!
2024 December 15
For the first time in nearly 2 years, I updated the front page here and the about section to be a little more up-to-date, and a little less "oh hi sorry this is a work in progress :3". Thank you for your understanding.
I also updated the ZZT games section to include a miniature game from earlier this year that I had forgotten. It's called "Coyceon Table" and it's, like, dark and moody or something (idk I just made it in 2.4 hours). The proper name of the game may be "Coycean Table", but I can't remember what the word generator said so I'm just gonna go off the title screen, capische?
2024 December 13
UFO 50 is what happens when you get a handful of indie developers together who tell each other "Oh ho ho ho!! Let's make a bunch of retro games, just like old times! How hard could it be?" Apparently the answer is "Very hard" and "It took us 8 years please save us we're dying!!!"
Anyhow, one of the games in it is called "Vainger." Critics are calling it a "metroidvania." I call it "pretty decent." The level and map design is kinda wonky in a lot of ways, but I like it. It has a neat futuristic aesthetic and a gravity flipping mechanic. You should play it.
You can already guess the reason I'm bringing this particular game up: I made a map of it! Check it out on the maps page!
Note: The current version of the map is technically a "release candidate." I might update it within the next couple of days depending on feedback. Thank you for your understanding.
2024 November 26
Made some slight adjustments to the MetConst Contest hack list. Namely, I added the results of the Starbase contest, and indicated that Isolation is now available on the main site.
Please note that some of the hacks marked as "NOMS" are now Lost Media after Metroid Construction got hacked a couple months back and all the forum attachments got deleted. I made a thread on the MetConst forums addressing this issue. Your help would be appreciated.
2024 November 11
With my newest ZZT project finally done, I finally had the energy to make some art that I had been putting off for months.
Two new ZZT-style portraits have been added to the Visual Art page! Both are characters from my friend Snorb's lovely (and trolly) La Vie Moderne de FRANCHISE ZZT series.
Mariko Raingrace is a modern druid with a bit of that Sailor Neptune drip. If you mess with the trees, you mess with her.
Thea Landen is the notorious ZZT Bandit, if she were in indefatigable genki girl XD. She may be fun, but watch your pockets if you're around her. (Also, yes she's named after a character from Phantasy Star III: Generations of Doom. Why do you ask?)
2024 November 10
It's just past the end of October, so you know what that means? Another ZZT game for Oktrollberfest!
You can play my latest ZZT work, Awful Dates Done Quick: Samantha's Heart Freely Flies Away on itch.io this very second. The accolades are already rolling in, so get on it while it's hot!
Naturally, the title screen of the game has been added to the ZZT sub-page (I swear I'll add some commentary/retrospectives to that subsection eventually).
2024 October 12
Not really an update to this site, but fellow cartographer drb has finally made a website!!!
Previously he had been posting links to his maps in a forum post halfway through a random forum thread on MetConst. However, MetConst recently got hacked and wiped (and mostly recovered), so I suspect that may have provided him the motivation to give his maps a proper home (just a guess -- haven't talked with the guy).
The links on the maps page and links page have been updated to reflect this development.
2024 October 5
It's about 12 hours later, and I've just done some more housekeeping here. In terms of making comment threads, I'm up to Q3 of 2023. Check them all out on the forum!
Also, I've finally put the previous quarters from this year into the news archive for once. Thank you for your patience. :)
2024 October 5
It's past midnight, so I guess this is technically an October 5th update.
Anyhow, after months and months of ignoring it, I finally started working on the Links Page in earnest. It still needs quite a bit of filling out, but it's a start. (Feel free to pester me if I haven't added your page yet.)
I also finished making comment threads for Quarter 2 of 2023 on the forum! I'd make a comment thread for this post right now, but I think having to wait until I finish catching up with myself provides some solid motivation to finish catching up.
Ciao!
2024 October 2
Yesterday, the venerable new social media site "Cohost" shut down for good, due to something called "financial unsustainability." This finally was the kick in the pants I needed to start up my very own forum!
The forum is now live here!!! <- Please click
It still needs a theme and some other finishing touches, but it at least works.
The link to the guestbook on the navbar has now been replaced with a link to the forum, though it will take me a while to propagate this change to every page (enjoy the variegation while you can!).
Anyhow, I am also in the process of retroactively creating comment threads for nearly every old news item on the forum, starting from the very first quarter of this site! This also will take a while. I'm also retroactively adding links in the old newsposts to their new comment threads.
And, yes, before you ask, this update will be one of the last to get a new thread.